9/25/09

So good, I had to steal it.

So I found this on my cousin's blog,
which is quite cool,
they have a terrific sense on humor.

So in the grand tradition of cutting
and pasting. I have "borrowed" it.

Cus it was the kind of thing that makes you
laugh enough that you simply must
share it with others.

And the three people I sat down
and made listen to me read it
out loud,
were simply
not enough.

found these "random thoughts of 25 to 30 year old's"


-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves
me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it.

-How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to
finish a text.

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart",
all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'
examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete
idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and
said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
i nstinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do!

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go
around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly
nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be
a problem....

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't
watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.

9/19/09

Blanding


So we drove down to Blanding
few weeks ago
to meet my new nephew,
Camden.






Who could not be sweeter
Nope, not possible

And Zeb,
I do apologize
for calling your little man
sweet.

I'm sure that will time
he will grow into something
tougher, and smarter,
and more athletic
but
for now
he is simply
sweet












And spend time with my sisters.
The thing about having sisters,
I now realize is that you own all the same cloths
cuz you have similar tastes,
and body types.
Which means,
if I like it and it looks good on me chances are,
the same will be true for my sisters.
Plus,
we like to shop
together.

For instance,
I own a copy of
every
article
of clothing in this picture,
and I bought them all
with my sisters!



And spend time with family,
and remember just how funny my brother
Jason and his wife can be
and
miss them
just a little bit
more








And learned to play Scum
which you all should do





















And on the way home,
we discovered
a truly funky tourist trap
which met the definition,
in every
sense
of the word



























Complete with a memorial
to Franklin D. Roosevelt
Carved right into
this huge rock
Although
I can not
for the life of me
figure out
Why

But it made me
laugh




9/12/09

The Bet

So this year I planted a garden.
And since we live in an apartment,
I planted it all in pots.
Some mounted on walls
Some hanging
and some regular.

I planted zucchini,
cuz I'm from Utah
and you can't call it a garden
if you didn't plant zucchini.

Well Todd laughed at me and said
that there is no way it would grow.

And my friend Victoria,
who actually knows a lot about gardens
said it would not grow.

But, Ha, cuz here it is.....



It's too bad I didn't have something good riding on this.

9/7/09